I've been out here in Virginia for over a year. In a few weeks, I will be 30. Needless to say, I've been doing a lot of thinking and evaluating of my life so far. Right now, it seems as though it all happened to someone else and I was just watching it all. Nothing seems quite real, and I do not know what is a dream and what is real. I am sick in body and soul, but this is all there is and I must carry on tyring to make the best of it.
Before I left, I had a tarot reading. That reading has stayed with me this last year, and has proved to eerily prophetic. The cards said I would find a place here, that someone would be waiting for me here, but that I would suffer (The Tower figured large) and that I would be alone and isolated. It's strange how card after card from that reading has come in to my life over the last year. Nothing has gone as I had hoped, half of what I touch turns to dust, and I find myself being in some critical way incompatible with much of my life, or at the very least removed from it. But The Star was there too, there is a light at the end of this. Between where I stand today and that small light, there are many obstructions, but I have to hold on to the hope it represents, and I have to trust that I will see it again soon.
For now, classes start again on the 21st, I am looking to move into a smaller but nicer place further away from campus, and I am trying to cling to what hope and what light I can. And I am trying to be content with what I have and find stillness again.
There's been enough stick, I am ready for a little of that carrot now, please.
The Rockstar Sweater is totally done and made it back to California, where it was very well received. The final sweater looked very sad and lumpy until I got it blocked and tired it on (sorry E, how I could I resist?) when it turned into a very nice, shapely and lovely little thing I am almost inspired to knit for myself. Almost. Maybe. If I do it in the round.
Right now, I am working on a backgammon board from KnitWhits, which is turning out to be a lot of fun to knit. This will be my brothers Christmas gift I think. I'm going to try to (finally) finish the Orenburg shawl I started from my SIL last year in time for that to be her Christmas gift, leaving me with just a pair of socks to knit for dad and a couple of washcloths until I am done with holiday knitting. Yay for that! And double yay for being close to having time to knit myself a cozy new sweater from the latest IK for fall!
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