Tuesday, August 30, 2005

Perfect fit

Can someone remind me again why I am here?

This song fits my current state of mind on so many levels it's scary.

I miss him. It's ridiculous. Somehow he feels impossibly far away, further than the 3000 miles warrant. I miss a lot of people actually, people I know how to relate to and understand and have things in common with, people I don't have to hide from. Out here, I feel like I can't really be honest about who I am or what I believe in, or really anything to do with my former life. I feel very removed from everyone around me, in ways I really wasn't prepared for. It's isolating. And I really don't feel like I belong here. How can I really contribute to the "school community" if I feel like half of who I am has gone into hiding? How can I make friends if I am hiding?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I did the *exact* *same* *thing* when Javi left. I didn't know any of my classmates. All I wanted to do was hide but that only made it worse. During winter break while he was gone I once went a week with never leaving the house. My hermit tendencies came out in full force, I'm only now getting over them.

Find a studious girlfriend and befriend her. Someone you can hang out with on the weekends while you two study. With my pal Susan we used to attempt to cook a dinner and then settle down for some good old fashioned number crunching.

Could this be what's up with you ibook?
http://www.apple.com/support/ibook/faq/